Essex v Sussex

Alright me ol china, ow’s your father, take me up the apples and other mockney stereotypes! Last year our match against Essex was a washout, and the forecast for this game looked as reliable as one of Del Boy’s answerphones.

Match One

Ian Potter and Joe Angella thrashed Kevin Smith (Captain) and Jamie Watson (Vice Captain). Following on from a magnificent breakfast, Ian and Joe got off to a slow start. Ian hit a purple patch, and we ran out easy winners. It was great fun; Kevin and Jamie were good company and generous hosts. Won 4&3.

Match Two

Brian Street (President) and Nigel Wates took on the Upminster Club Captain, Tony Dance and Chris Callaway. The company was superb, and the quality of the golf was high. It was true Captain’s golf. (Nigel fluffed a chip into a bunker before splashing out to miss the green. It was such a rare sight that it warrants a mention. Ed.) Lost 2&1.

Match Three

Brian Sparkes and Geoff Hutton beat Mitch Clark and Rasoul Shahilow. The match was played in good spirits. Geoff and Brian played well with holes won in birdies. It was a fantastic day on a  good golf course, and Mitch was a great partner. If it hadn’t been for an unfortunate incident with wood on the 18th, we would not have lost 1 Down.

Match Four

Craig Millyard (Proper Golfer) and Andy Plowright took on David Handley and Nigel Popper. It was a great game played in a good spirit (Aren’t they all? Ed) on a thinking man’s course. We were done up like a pair of kippers by the Essex lads. Craig had seven birdies, and Andy had several net birdies, but we still lost 3&2. It was a pleasant afternoon.

Match Five

Ronni Schrevel and Keith Talbot played Steve Hazell and Michael Miles. Ronni told me to say that Keith was an excellent partner who contributed to our hard-fought win with good spirit and resolve. Three birdies and an excellent match ended on the 18th. Won 1 Up.

Match Six

Trevor Haegar and Des Malcolm entertained Neil Packer and Richard Gregory. We had a close match with Neil and Richard, all played in good spirit. Everyone played some excellent golf; we nearly completed a comeback from three down but fell short, just like the putt on the last. Lost 1 Down.

Match Seven

Andy Lamb and David Sinden were taken to the cleaners by Terry Glover and Richard Higgins. Not a good day at the office for the Sussex Gentlemen. We can only blame it on the lack of the eagerly anticipated full English Breakfast. Our only consolation was winning the back nine, which shows how poor the front nine was. Lost 6&5.

Match Eight

Mick Grimes and Ian Wood battled with Phil Roberts and Steve Biggis. Woody and I played very well, but Steve and Phil returned from two down with two birdies to halve the match. They were a pair of naughty boys.

Match Nine

Bryan Fairbrass and Nigel Powell lamped Nigel Cook and Jim Culleton. You know you are in for a tough game when the opposition opens with a birdie. Fortunately for Sussex, that was the best they had. Steady play from Bryan and Nigel ensured an excellent win. Won 6&5.

Match Ten

Peter Rodger and Richard Bevan played Gordon Irving and Ron Bridge. Excellent game, course and company. It was a very close game until the last few holes, where Peter, a very steady player, managed to put a few putts together to pull ahead. Won 3&2.

Result Essex 5 1/5 – Sussex 4 1/5

Sadly, our trip to Essex resulted in a loss. It was a close game, and it was a lot of fun. However, the day was not a total loss; the homemade steak pie was delicious, and the bar served Timothy Taylor “Landlord”,  a top pint.